Wednesday, 22 June 2011
Surrealism at home - 3
A lithe Oriental lady of my close acquaintance and I frequently start the day with a conversation that runs broadly along these lines.
"Have you finished in the shower, my darling?"
"I'll be out in a moment, dearest."
"Can you mind the freshly-fed Guthlac while I perform my ablutions, Precious Jewel of the Orient?"
"I am already running late, Thruthelthrolth son of Ethelbreth. What you ask is impossible."
"But as to the young Guthlac, Most Favoured Daughter of the Yellow Emperor?"
"You'll have to take him into the bathroom with you, lord of the semi-detached mead-hall."
"But that is - and I freely admit my shortcomings in this area O Glowing Lantern of the Huaren - beyond my powers."
"You are in this respect a typical man, he of whose DIY and garden-related incompetence the bards sing extended comic lays, in that you find multi-tasking beyond your pitiful handful of so-called competencies."
"So are you in fact telling me, Paragon of Wifely Control of the Nansha, that you are better at multi-tasking than I, a fact which I am more than ready to grant you?"
"That is undeniable, O ring-loser and sword bender."
"Then why can't you have Guthlac in the bathroom with you?"
"Stop talking now."
Posted by Gyppo Byard at 06:17